Thursday, 7 August 2014

Day 251 - Manifesting nervous reaction through grinding teeth

Only last night I noticed that I actually tend to do this quite often when I am feeling nervous within my body. My house mates were talking to eachother last night, and I was getting something out of my drawer, but...I wanted to do so quietly, lol. I tend to do that a lot, it's like, I don't want to disturb anybody. Within that, it's like I'm suppressing myself, I am suppressing myself by attempting to make NO or as little noise as possible in the fear that I'm disturbing people. I paid for this particular room in which I'm renting at this house. It's not like I signed a contract when I first moved into this particular house that said "Rule 1: NO noises are to be made while in this house." That would just be bizarre.

Anyway, back to this scenario...as I was getting something out of the drawer, I was physically grinding my teeth quite hard together, almost to a point of pain, well, there was pain. Albeit, not a whole lot of pain, but pain nonetheless. Of course, within that, and within my writing thus far of this scenario, as always, I realise that my behaviour is SO unjustified and unnecessary. Therefore - it is time to forgive myself.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed the reaction of nervousness to overwhelm me, and to then within my unconscious mind, physically grind my teeth together within a fear of disturbing others that are in my house.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to suppress myself by attempting to make little to no noise as to THINK that I am disturbing others.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see and realise within myself, the harmful effects of grinding my teeth together, which could physically be my teeth being in constant pain, crooked teeth, and a crooked jaw.

When and as I see myself manifesting a nervous reaction to attempting to make no noise in the worry that I'm disturbing others by grinding my teeth together, I stop and breathe. I realise that I'm suppressing myself physically by trying to not disturb others and by making little to no noise - within that, I also realise that I'm literally harming my teeth by grinding them together, thus causing damaging effects such as potential pain, crooked teeth and a crooked jaw.

When and as I see myself allowing these mind-created shackles to take hold of me in saying that I can't make noise because I'll disturb others, I stop and breathe. I realise that I've accepted and allowed my mind to define my movements by first reacting in nervousness to wanting to be quiet and not disturb others, and then allowing my mind to define my movements thereafter by grinding my teeth within my unconscious mind.

I commit myself to quit suppressing my physical body through attempting to be quiet out of a FEAR that I am actually disturbing others by making noises and sounds.

I commit myself to make as much noise/sound as possible, within reason, though, of course.

I commit myself to not allow my mind to define my movements and to define my actions and to define myself as an individual.

I commit myself to be the directive principle within myself as to then not participate in a fear of making noise/disturbing others, and to thus not allow a reaction of nervousness and physical grinding of my teeth to follow.

I commit myself to realise and understand within myself that I have been and I am constantly doing harm to my teeth by grinding them through my conscious and subconscious mind telling me as my physical self that I should not be making noise and that making noise will disturb others - I commit myself to stop myself in the moment and breathe through any conscious mind thoughts of not allowing myself to make noise, and stopping myself as to not allow nervous reaction within my body/unconscious mind manifestation of grinding my teeth together.

I commit myself to not allow anymore thoughts within my mind to sway and persuade me to react through grinding my teeth together.

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