Friday, 15 August 2014

Day 259 - Fear of using forklift

Although I may not run 'into' fear as soon as I had previously before deciding to write about this, it is a fear I have nonetheless.

So, I've been job searching, and I applied for a warehouse job. Things like packing trucks, unpacking trucks, moving boxes, things like that. I was going to do a course so that I could increase my chances of getting a job in this industry, but I can't do the course because it is a government funded course and only 2 are allowed to be started per year - I've already reached my limit.

Anyway, I spoke to someone who suggested that I do this course to increase my chances of landing this warehouse job, and this person also said that if I were to obtain my forklift license, that would increase my chances of landing this warehouse job even more. At the time, I said "Yeah, sure!" I really wanted a job/the warehouse job, so I said I'd certainly be willing to get a forklift license as well as complete the warehouse general course.

But after the interview, and well, even when this person asked me whether I'd want to get my forklift license, I had all these backchats within myself of "It's going to be too difficult for me to drive a forklift - I'm not good enough to drive a forklift." And "Driving a forklift is a LOT of responsibility, I might accidentally kill someone with it." Backchats like that. I didn't have time to stop and breathe, I was in an interview and got asked on the spot whether I'd be willing to undertake training for this forklift license.

So - this is like a fear of taking responsibility within the operation of the forklift. Me preferring to do the 'easier' work, as opposed to the forklift-work.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear using a forklift.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed backchats of "It's going to be too difficult for me to drive a forklift - I'm not good enough to drive a forklift." And "Driving a forklift is a LOT of responsibility, I might accidentally kill someone with it."

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I'd be trained extremely thoroughly to operate the forklift - not realising within myself that I'd never be allowed, and within reason, to operate the forklift without being properly trained as to how it functions, how to stop accidents, things like this.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear using a forklift because it's a 'new' item of machinery in which I've never used before and never had thought I'd use before.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not consider my physical body learning to operate the forklift - I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to participate within the backchats of 'negativity' whereas I see all the 'bad' things that could happen if I were to operate the forklift.

I commit myself to not participate within the backchats of my mind whereas I see myself killing people accidentally, and the forklift being too difficult to drive - I stop and breathe, I realise that within my physical body, I am alert and HERE - as to not be focused on what COULD happen.

When and as I see myself fearing to learn how to operate a forklift, I stop and breathe. I realise that the backchats within myself are not REAL/necessary, I realise that they are mind fears in which I've accepted and allowed myself to participate within.

When and as I see myself not realising that my physical body as I am here is all I need to learn/operate the forklift, I stop and breathe. I realise that within my physical body, I will take on all the information as to how to operate the forklift - and within this, I commit myself to STOP and BREATHE in the moment that conscious mind thoughts start appearing within myself that I will mess up the operating of the forklift.

I commit myself to learn/operate the forklift within and only in my physical body as I am here - I commit myself to not particpate in the thoughts of what may happen if I were to operate the forklift - realising that these are mind based fears only.

I commit myself to realise within my physical body that I can learn to do ANYTHING, and realise that the ONLY thing that is stopping me from potentially learning how to operate the forklift is my MIND.

I commit myself to not see the operation of a forklift as an impossible/difficult task that I could not possibly perform/am not good enough to perform - again realising that these are fears which originated in my mind in which I've accepted and allowed myself to listen to, hence my physical reactions within my unconscious mind.

I commit myself to NOT give up on my PHYSICAL SELF - as I am only that, my physical self and body. I commit myself to realise that I must physically/practically ACT along with my self-forgiveness/commitment statements so that I can SEE physical change within myself and know/realise/understand that I CAN operate a forklift.

1 comment:

  1. There are a few ways that you can find free forklift training and that is always better than paying for a private training course instead. Forklift Course

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