Monday, 22 September 2014

Day 295 - Why do bad things always happen to me?

I ask myself this question a WHOLE lot. It seems to be a daily question within each daily routine that I endure. An 'uncool' part of the routine, that is. It can be ANYTHING. Things where I have asked myself this question lately have been from the 'not cool' happening of myself not getting calls back from jobs that I've applied for/not getting called up for interviews. Car troubles, and having to pay a whole load of money to fix a bunch of stuff to do with my car when I'm already struggling for money, even simple things such as tripping over, or hurting myself somehow, they all end up ending in the same question "Why do bad things always happen to me?"

I can already see within the question of why do bad things always happen to me, that I'm in fact playing the victim of all my 'issues' and all my 'troubles' and 'struggles'. I'm playing the victim. I am also failing to take responsibility for the things that occur within my life or that are apart of my life. I can see all these 'bad' things as just me being unlucky, and bad things always happening to me - I can look at it that way, or I can look at all of these 'struggles' as a trial/error sort of thing, where I learn form my past mistakes, and fix them, whether it's through writing/practical application, or just general know-how of not making the same mistake in future. It's all about the starting point that I have in regards to 'bad' things always happening to me.

Paying for my car to be fixed doesn't have to be a 'bad' thing. Obviously I'd rather not spend money on it, but it has to be fixed. If I don't get it fixed now, then I'll possibly end up with a DEAD car within a few months, or....have to pay more than I originally had wanted to pay if I had just got it fixed in the present/now. And within that, I can see it as a cool time to get a bunch of quotes from car mechanics, and to find the cheapest/most reliable, and can then gather that information to store for later usage when I need to get my car fixed in future. Hell, I can even learn to fix my car myself, with the help of researching online/or however else I can research, purchasing the parts, and fixing my car myself depending on what needs to be fixed. So what I'm saying is that I can look at the point of fixing my car as a massive hassle in my life, I can see it like..why do bad things always happen to me, OR, I can see it as a cool learning experience - which is what will stay with me within my life and get me somewhere to avoid the potentiality of further mistakes occurring.

Self-forgiveness/commitment statements to come.
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