Sunday, 8 February 2015


CAPS. Need to really highlight that for myself, to bring EVERY POINT BACK TO SELF. My buddy within my process has assisted me in realising that I still continue to NOT bring points BACK TO MYSELF. And that is a reason, I realise now, that I struggle to 'let go' of certain points. It doesn't matter who says what, or what they do to me, I have to TAKE IT BACK TO SELF - It's not about pointing fingers, finding someone to blame, finding a culprit - that gets me NOWHERE. It all starts with me, with self. And if I still react to point/issue, if I still react to a point/issue that I react to if someone says something to me, then I must take that back to self, to find out WHY I still react to words regarding that point. Always starts with self.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to ALWAYS look for something EXTERNAL to blame. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to look for a culprit outside of myself, instead of taking SELF-RESPONSIBILITY for the reactions that I have towards ANYTHING, and using that as a means of seeing, realising and understanding that I have a point to write out, a point to forgive myself for, and a point to self-correct/self-commit/self-change.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that the reason that I attempt to find something outside of myself to blame, is because TAKING SELF-RESPONSIBILITY can be 'difficult' to accept - but it MUST BE DONE - because I am absolutely 100% responsible for everything that I do, for the state of Earth, for what I accept and allow to take place on Earth, for the suffering, for everything - and until I and each life takes self-responsibility for what we've each accepted and allowed - Practical change can NOT happen.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to through failing to take self-responsibility for everything that I do and have accepted and allowed, DELAY my process of change and delay my process of understanding/letting go of points, because I've been too busy finding something external to blame, finding an external culprit - all as a means of avoiding SELF-RESPONSIBILITY.

When and as I see myself looking for something/someone outside of myself to blame/to be the culprit to resistances inside of MYSELF/that I HAVE, I stop and breathe. I realise that NOT taking self-responsibility for anything is programmed within me, whereas I within my life have seen MANY TIMES that I ALWAYS find and have found/searched for ANYTHING/ANYONE outside of myself to blame, AS LONG as I was the one that was 'in the clear' so to speak. I realise that this pattern of NOT TAKING SELF-RESPONSIBILITY is one of the reason's that I at times 'struggle' to ACCEPT self-responsibility. But, within this, I realise that this is NO EXCUSE to use - I realise that blame is a program in which I've accepted and allowed myself to exist as, albeit, it's time for me to BREAK this programming, BREAK the pattern of blame - to physically/practically TAKE self-responsibility for ALL that I/we've become - because that is the absolute key to change, after one takes self-responsibility in ALL facets and in all ways, shapes and forms. I commit myself to NOT participate within the blame program within myself, I commit myself to STOP the blame program - I commit myself to HEED the self-responsibility change that is NEEDED within myself, to BREAK my programming, to break the patterns, and to birth myself as life from the physical.

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