Friday, 13 March 2015
Day 397 - Trusting my physical self
A lot of the time, I still find that I'm not trusting my physical self within things that I do, and I instead am looking for answers within my mind. Something like dropping an object on the ground, I'd then pick it up of course. Why do I pick up the object? Because I physically know that I've dropped an object. No mind is required for me to know or to actually pick up the object, it's a fully physical movement/solution. Dropping an object/being careless with something is not ideal, this is but an example I am using.
Because using that same example, I have at times perhaps 'thought' I've dropped an object, only to check the ground for the object for instance, and seen nothing. Thoughts cannot be trusted. If I listen to my thoughts in these instances constantly, then I'd be forever worried/continually checking if I have dropped an object, when in reality, I only need to physically know of whether I've dropped an object or not.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not trust in my physical self/body and within this, my physical movements or lack thereof to know thus if I must do something, like pick up an object that I have dropped.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to rely on answers/solutions within my mind, not realising that thoughts cannot be trusted, because they misguide me in doing something that in reality, does not need to be physically done/altered/moved.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to rely solely on my mind and thus within thoughts/fears/worries.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I cannot survive without thoughts,
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that I CAN live as a physical body.
When and as I see myself failing to put trust within my physical body/self, I stop and breathe. I realise that my physical body is all I need to be able to guide me to do things/perform certain actions/movements, and realising within this that I thus do not need my mind and within this, thoughts/fears and looking within these thoughts/fears for solutions on how to act/move within my physical body, because in reality, all movement is physical, as are all actions. I commit myself to trust my physical body/self and to rely on it exclusively to be able to pick up on things, to make movements, to do things, and to thus not feel a need to rely on thoughts to guide me/to make movements.
When and as I see myself not realising that because I am so used to relying solely on thoughts to guide me, that it feels 'odd' to rely on my physical body/self for movements/to guide me, I stop and breathe. I realise that in every way, shape and form, my physical self CAN be trusted, and that I can thus trust it to be able to then make decisions/movements/allow it to guide me to do something that is necessary for my body, and to within this, not allow thoughts/backchats to stop me from doing the physical thing/movement that is required, as my thoughts are only trying to 'put me back on the same path' that I have lived within my whole life, whether that be through fears or otherwise. I commit myself to see, realise and understand that I do not need thoughts to make movements within my physical body, and I do not need thoughts to make 'correct' decisions within my physical body - as my physical body/self is literally all I need to be able to move correctly/make informed decisions about things that I do within my life.