Wednesday, 23 December 2015
Day 536 - Failure to recognise my change
I've had these thoughts recently that my change as an individual 'has not been dramatic enough' and within this believing that I have failed to make any 'notable' progress to better myself as life and make a difference as life, not only as myself, but as an example for others and/or assisting others.
But, within my current assignment in DIP Pro where I am currently reviewing past assignments and so past points that I have written out/released as to check if any further writing/releasing is needed on these past points that I've written out before, I now see that I've made MANY notable changes. And they MAY be 'small' points and/or not points that are for all to see type of thing/that noticeable, but they are points that I had to change and I HAVE changed - this is what I see now and now that I realise it/what I've changed, and the many points that I have changed about myself, it's really gratifying.
As I was mentioning, a lot of these points may 'appear' small, but every single point..and there are LOADS that I must walk through...they all are me. All of these points are me. So, one way or the other, I must release each of these points. Each point must be faced/tackled individually. There are more points that I must face, and there will be more in the future, but no point is 'worthless'. Even though it may not have had a HUGE impact on me/appeared regularly in instance, is not to say it didn't have to be walked through.
So I see now that ANY point walked through really is an ACCOMPLISHMENT. Because these are not easy. No point is easy to walk through. Because to walk through a point we have to be self-honest and we have to face ourselves - there is no escape.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see 'small' points walked through as 'meaningless' and 'pointless' for the reason that they did not impact me 'too much' or 'in regular instances' within my life.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that EACH AND EVERY point walked through/released IS an accomplishment, because to do so, I had to be self-honest and so I had to face it fully to change it, and so it is an accomplishment and it is gratifying to know I have changed and know that change can happen with self-honesty.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that EVERY point is a part of who I am/what I am in this world, and so no point is actually 'less than' another point, because ALL points must be released, and this can only happen through walking every point one by one.
When and as I see myself desiring to believe that I have in fact made NO and/or LITTLE progress within change of myself, I stop and breathe. I realise that within this belief, I've failed to take into account the 'small' points that I've walked/released. I realise also that within this belief, I'm clearly not AWARE of the change that I've had/become regarding any points that I've walked/released, and so these changes that I've made 'go unnoticed' by myself.
I commit myself to stop in any moment where this desire to believe that lack of change is existent within me and to look at the very thing that I'm doing at that time to see what/how I'm doing it, where I'm doing it, and then to look at what I would have done many years ago in the same circumstances so as to see and recognise thus the changes that I've made as my starting point/my approach to doing these things presently when looking back at how I would have/how I did do these same things in the past, and so realising and really seeing the changes that I've implemented within myself as life.
Also, I commit myself to look at my progress thus far. I commit myself to re-read my past assignments within DIP Pro. I commit myself to look at my past work in DIP Lite. I commit myself to look at my writings in my Journey to Life.
I commit myself to look at these things so that I can really see what points I've faced, and then I can see how far I've come in reality, and how different I am from that person I was, that person I was stuck as being.
Basically, I commit myself to recognise my change. I commit myself to recognise that all points walked/released ARE accomplishments, no matter how big/small the point was.