Thursday, 25 May 2017

Day 682 - Getting shit done


Getting shit done is comforting. A sense of accomplishment for sure. I got home from work and did quite a few things that previously I may not have done (this is an issue) - anyway I’ll return to that soon…but getting these things done one by one effectively and efficiently is great. Making strides/progress through my own physical actions and movement. Just as I’m doing now with writing. As I mentioned, generally I only do these things effectively/efficiently here and there as opposed to consistently.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to do things I need to do consistently in my daily life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to enjoy the results I achieve through this consistency of practical application/movement in changing something/myself for the best result possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify not being consistent and not doing the practical stuff I need to do in totality and instead just doing bits here and there as a type of shortcut through my justifications.

I see, realise and understand that any shortcuts I desire to take are just justifications and/or excuses that I KNOW within myself self-honestly do not benefit me whatsoever, because the result is not the best, the effort is not the best, and later it only means more work for me to do, so I see that the consistency benefits me in every way, shape and form, as opposed to bits here and there as shortcuts which just culminate in more time needed where I can be doing other things I want to do.

I commit myself to be effective with the things I need to do by seeing what must be done and doing it ONE BY ONE, as opposed to in my mind, just seeing all the shit I have to do and not wanting to do it or doing it here and there. I see, realise and understand that when I put my best into Doing 1 thing at a time, that thing gets done the most effectively. I commit myself to do 1 thing and then move onto the next thing for the most impact as what is best.

Desteni

Saturday, 20 May 2017

Day 681 - Ruthless


Okay, so the definition of this word is “having or showing no pity or compassion for others.” Example: "a ruthless manipulator".
So in this definition, I mean, it’s not so cool is it? It’s not what is best for all. It’s not kind, beneficial or appropriate. But I’ve seen AT TIMES, not this definition exactly, but this word came to mind, to be ruthless. For example, when I am driving and I’m waiting for the time when I can go into that lane or turn into that road. SOME roads are just constantly busy lol. So there’s never EXACTLY an appropriate time to go into that road/lane. But if I don’t go at some point, then I literally never go, so that doesn’t assist anyone.

And so as per the level of business/amount of cars and it not changing enough for when I’d ‘usually’ go into that lane/road, I have to compromise and just go into it when I see I ‘can’. This is where this word came up for me. Not just here, but this is an example. Even getting on trains. At some points, well peak hour times, everyone is rushing to get on the train to go home. You see people pushing against eachother to secure either a seat or just a standing position on that train. Before I would basically hang back and just sort of hope there’s space left lol, which isn’t always the case. Here the thing is usually there is a train soon after that I can easily get on because everyone crammed to get onto that train earlier. So that is fine. But I’ve at times, not done this, but been more ‘forward’ in actually getting on the train. So holding my ground type-thing.

So these are some examples where you may see why this word “Ruthless” came up within me. Sometimes you know, you have to play the game that exists, even though, and in an ideal world/society, I wouldn’t have to, but here, at times I do, like each of us.

So another word I can use here is INVOLVED. Lol, to be more involved in what is occurring so I can secure a place on the train or my place in that lane/road. Otherwise I wait forever literally or wait too long for no reason.

I commit myself to get myself INVOLVED in scenarios whereas I see that I do have to at times play the game/by the rules of society/the mind so as to get what I require/need, as all do.

I commit myself not to fear involvement as being insincere/cruel/mean/harsh, realising here that this is not my starting point and I’m not literally doing this as pushing others or causing a road accident - it’s just the way the state of play is and so I have to abide to it to an extent to participate.

When and as I see myself fearing to get myself INVOLVED, I stop and breathe. I see, realise and understand that involvement does not have to be mean, tough, harsh etc - it can be to be, to participate effectively, to benefit, which I’ve seen at times is a necessity to function effectively in society and the world as it currently sits.

Desteni

Wednesday, 17 May 2017

Day 680 - Thought, word and deed


I initially had reservations and a sense of confusion about what this statement meant. I mean, let me rephrase..I initially had reservations and a sense of confusion about what this statement meant in the CONTEXT of the physical. What I mean by this is after and/or AS we are removing the patterns/programs we participate in as the mind. Because the thing is, to not be of the mind, is to not be of THOUGHT. So how could one live/be what is best for all in thought, word and deed when the ‘thought’ part equates already/as the mind?

This was my question, my confusion, my resistance, my reservation, because it didn’t add up to me and seemed like a contradiction thus whenever I’d see/hear “Being the best we can be in thought, word and deed.” - what I learnt is that this is simply a STEP in the JOURNEY to the physical. So, at start, we have thoughts and they are charged with energy, charged with anger, charged with hate, with joy, with happiness, with judgment etc. What’s the next step? It is the best we can be in thought, word and deed - how so?

Because after we stop our participation in these energy charged thoughts, we’ll PRACTICE and begin IMPLEMENTING our self-forgiveness etc in real time moments. Whereas the thought comes up to perhaps do something or have a thought about something, but in that moment, we breathe, we slow down, and we make sure that thought is free from energy associated in any way, shape or form. A practical thought as one assisted me to see, realise and understand with clarification. A practical thought as to do something, a task, and to then perform the necessary action in real time and the physical.

Because, and what I was missing, not seeing, realising and understanding was that this PROCESS happens in STEPS or STAGES. And how I see these steps/stages is dependent purely upon my AWARENESS. So I see I haven’t been so aware of my process of change, which is another reason this thought, word and deed as what is best for all statement did not make sense to me. Not only that, what I realised after is we are ALL and EACH at totally different stages of process. Lol, for example, obviously, the articles, the interviews - the materials generally are obviously NOT just for myself and my process and where I’m personally at - same with everyone. It’s a very broad spectrum with people possibly having no prior understanding of the Desteni material. What is best for ALL after all. Not what is best for me or one lol.

Anyway, going back a bit, with the step/stage that involves removing the energy association of the thought - then implementing this in real time moments/the physical, then we practice with having practical thoughts. What I did not see as my lack of awareness, was that I was not simply going from thoughts to no thoughts. I was in fact going from energy-associated thoughts, to practical thoughts, to physical movement (without thoughts). Physical movement without thoughts is to mean that we’re beyond that particular programming/pattern and thus we move in a moment as per what is required of us. To take out the rubbish, to clean the house, to go shopping, to play a sport, to do an assignment.

I’m very thankful for this assistance/clarification I have received generally and obviously regarding this particular point - all available within the Desteni I Process which will change your life, guaranteed - check it out!

Image credit

Desteni

Monday, 15 May 2017

Day 679 - Gaming and Reality (Part 1) - Life Review follow up


When I saw that this interview was available for purchase, I was immediately interested, being a gamer myself, both now and when I was younger. It is a great interview with detailed explanations/sharing of why we become so dependent on video games, why people of all ages do. The interview also goes into how we can make sure gaming is in our lives as something that supports, something where we can use BALANCE. Highly recommended.

It is said in the interview to investigate our own relationship to gaming and also, to highlight words where gaming supports us in our lives.

Actually, what I notice when I was a kid and I first got a Super Nintendo console, I mean, lol I just remember playing it heaps. I really enjoyed it. Had plenty of different games, but man, games were tough then! In terms of the skill level required, but still fun…but also frustrating lol. I actually remember getting very annoyed a lot of the time because I would keep dying (my character). In terms of how it affected my social life/life outside of gaming, it didn’t actually. I mean, I did play quite a lot. Like after school I’d have something to eat, then play.

The issue that I see then was that it was almost ALL I did lol. Which you’d think would mean it did have an effect on my social life, but no, because the thing was that I’d still hang out with friends a lot, whether I went to their house or they came over to mine, for sleepovers etc, the thing is though, we’d spend the whole time gaming haha. So a lot of my life was gaming. It was like school, gaming, and social gaming. I definitely did enjoy overcoming challenges in the games. Even though as I said, I allowed them to get the best of me in terms of my emotions/feelings.

But looking back, it’d definitely be best to not game as much and be open to doing a greater variety of activities with myself and my friends.
Moving forward to now, I own a Playstation 4. Haven’t had it for that long actually. And I do play quite often. What I enjoy about gaming is how interactive it is. Watching a movie/something is cool too, no doubt, but watching AND manipulating a character on screen/what is happening is something I enjoy. Even though for example the story is already set (a lot of the time anyway) and I’m just moving an avatar around, I enjoy a well developed story and detailed world with many places to explore and things to do.

Now though, my relationship to gaming is much healthier. I enjoy it yes, but I do many other things too, I do enjoy hanging out with others, usually actually elsewhere from home, listening to music, watching things, learning, sport etc.

For me, gaming supports me through enjoyment, learning, growing, understanding, overcoming challenges, not giving up. So now, when a challenge comes up (despite a lot of games these days not being as difficult as back then) can still be challenging, I stop, I breathe, and I retry, and/or I’ll stop playing, do something else and next time I’ll pick it up again and have a turn. So it teaches me patience, consistency, to fight (never give up/give in).

I’ve created a balance within and as gaming and within and as my general life and other activities I do.

Interview

Desteni

Friday, 12 May 2017

Day 678 - If it ain’t broke


Don’t fix it, right? Right lol. I’ve seen where I as the mind can come into play in a big way relating to this saying. For example, well yes, something is working as needed. No issues, none visible, no aural issues, whatever, and yet…there’s still this WANT to change it, to change how it functions or operates, change some settings for example. This can be in relation to anything, such as our human physical bodies too. Why can I not be satisfied with FUNCTION that is well, functioning as desired, as necessary, as needed? It is SELF-DOUBT as my mind. Doubting myself. Even though there’s nothing literal or substantial or actual to point in any way whatsoever to or as doubt in any way, shape or form.

Doubt doesn’t exist in reality. Why do we doubt things? We’re unsure. We’re worried. We’re scared. There should exist NO doubt whatsoever. Because proper and actual investigation into something shows us. So, back to my original point, it either works or doesn’t work. Sure, it can be expanded on or improved, but that is DIFFERENT to DOUBTING what exists and functions as per usual/needed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be under the illusion of DOUBT, realising here that DOUBT only exists because I’ve not investigated and/or am not AWARE of the REALITY of a situation where I can definitely see what exists and does not exist and so I then can act upon something dependent on my investigation and/or what exists/does not exist - and so this ‘lingering’ doubt or doubts are fruitless and in no way substantial, because in reality if something is fucked up, then I’ll act upon it and fix it or improve it or change it. There is NO reason to ‘change’ something that is working well, that I see is working as best for all in a moment - this I see is a waste of my time.

When and as I see myself desiring to doubt things that are clear, that are working, that are functional, that I’ve investigated and know do not need a second glance as to ‘double check’ or ‘investigate’ further, I stop and breathe. I see, realise and understand that if something is not working as per expected or necessary, I will act upon it and change, because why would I not? It’s not a complicated or complex method or thing to act upon. I see a need for change, and I change it therefore. There’s no lingering, there’s no in-between, I change it or I do not change it. So I commit myself to change what has to be changed. I commit myself NOT to change what does NOT need to be changed. I commit myself to ACCEPT what does NOT need to be changed.

Desteni

Thursday, 11 May 2017

Day 677 - An unequal response


I have not been responding to each one equally. And I’ve seen that this is because of the relationship type that I have with one vs the other. So, as you probably guessed, if I am ‘closer’ to one compared to one who I am not as close/so close with, I respond differently. In a particular instance, I was not as willing to assist/support, or at least respond, and this above is the reason that I now see. Having said this, on this occasion, I knew that it was best to respond/assist, but I didn’t..and the thing is, the moment goes fast. So if I had breathed for example in the moment and replied/said something, then cool, success, but I didn’t, and so the moment passed. I’ve noticed this a lot actually, just generally, these moments pass quickly, so one has to be fast and act fast as breath to best act in moments.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use relationship-type/bond-type as the reasoning for responding to one or not and how I respond or not.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that of course my relationship/bond with each will be different. There are so many factors involved. And thus to act upon that will always equate to/as separation as not treating each the exact same and not assisting/supporting and here, responding to each the exact same - just as I’d like to be treated and responded to and supported/assisted as/by.

When and as I see myself believing that I can’t act fast enough in moments, as breath, to act upon/act as what is best for all, I stop and breathe. I do see, realise and understand that all I can do is TRY here, and of course if I require more breathing and/or self-forgiveness which calls for a longer period of time, but the moment comes and goes like that and fast, then I just correct myself then/later so that this does not happen again, but if I can act and do it all in the moment, then I do. Within this, I commit myself not to judge myself for not being fast enough on my feet so to speak, in acting/responding as what is best for all in each moment - it depends on firstly how effective my breathing is/self-forgiveness is and where I am at of course in relation to the point.

I commit myself to do my best to respond as what is best for all and act as what is best for all in every single moment through my tools of breath, self-forgiveness, self-realisation and self-commitment statements.

I commit myself to support, assist and respond to all the exact same way without limitation or barriers.

Desteni

Sunday, 7 May 2017

Day 676 - Sticking to a plan


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to delay things I plan to do with nothing but EXCUSES and JUSTIFICATIONS in not doing that thing I planned to do.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to through breath, understand within myself whether thus there is something that is stopping me from doing what I planned, or if there is something I’d ‘rather’ do in the sense that I did not consider it at the time of planning for example.

I commit myself to PLAN within REASON so that I see that I won’t come to this situation whereas something else comes up/is more important/that I’d rather do - within this I see, realise and understand that there’s no reason for me not to consider ALL these factors so that I WILL stick to the plan.

So I commit myself to consider all things before I plan to make the plan happen.

Desteni

Friday, 5 May 2017

Day 675 - Finishing what I start


Here I am talking about more fast-type things to finish. Basically what I realised within myself is that I’ve been starting something, but then going to start on something else – but the consequence of this is then I realise that I forgot that initial thing I started and I’ll only realise this later on when I should have and was meant to do it all in that one moment. So here I see the reason I wanted to go from this, to this, then to that as my method of doing the overall job faster, but only left me falling behind because I was trying to do TOO MUCH and got lost in it all. So definitely I see here how if I focus on one thing at a time and wait until completion before moving onto the other thing, then I won’t be ‘forgetting’ based on wanting to do too much and wanting to do it very fast and believing I am saving time this way, when I am not.

That’s why I mentioned moreso ‘faster’ type movements/methods/activities to do. Because something like an art piece, you know, drawing some detailed image for example, that could very well take months for instance. Lol so not saying I’d then do that until completion and NOT do anything else because that is the first thing I focused on/started on, so I must finish it and NOT do any other task – no, not saying that ha. But these tasks, the one’s I’m talking about that are quite quick generally to finish, I see them best to see them through until the end before moving on. So to be patient with it because in the end, a lot of the time it saves me being more behind in what I do and forgetting/being confused or lost.

I commit myself to finish what I start before moving on to the next thing to do.

I commit myself not to do TOO MUCH whereas I then end up getting lost in it all and ‘confused’ as to what I then have done or not.

I commit myself to exude patience within myself whereas I just wait for a moment or 2 for that task to finish before moving onto the next task – this way I am actually more efficient because I know I’m not leaving certain tasks unfinished based on me constantly changing to other tasks in belief that this is making me do the overall job faster.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to do too much at once.

When and as I see myself desiring to move onto another task BEFORE that task has finished, I stop and breathe. I see, realise and understand that I know where this path will lead me, and that is into a state of juggling too much and then getting lost/forgetting as trying to do too much in the moment as opposed to just being that bit more patient to see something through before continuing to the next task and this way I see each moment through to completion and know I’ve efficiently and successfully completed the overall goal in the moment.

Desteni

Tuesday, 2 May 2017

Day 674 - Living consistency part 2


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be inconsistent.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lack consistency as what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to delay my change as what is best for all because I allow inconsistency.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that every moment is the opportunity to be consistent and to wait until the next moment is to step backwards as my self-change as well as self-honesty, instead of stepping forwards in life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that inconsistencies WILL and HAVE BEEN and ARE taking negative tolls on me, on my change, on my physical body as manifestations as sicknesses, as pains, as weaknesses.

I commit myself to allow myself to use consistency within every single moment.

I commit myself to be and live consistency through lots of breathing, through lots of slow down, through lots of pausing, through lots of self-forgiveness/self-realisations/self-commitment statements in the moment and as the written word.

I commit myself to in these moments of fear and such, to identify it as awareness and as the program that it is, and to in this instance, KNOW that stepping back here will not assist me and will only fuck me over in every way, shape and form – thus it’s not worth even CONSIDERING stepping backwards and not stepping forwards as change, self-change, as honesty, self-honesty – there’s nothing to consider, because there’s only one way to move and that is forward – forward through all the bullshit, all the difficult shit, all the patterns, all the programs, all the lies, all the manipulation, into a being that is one and equal with all life here.

I commit myself to live a simple equation that breath = consistency – as I have seen myself that breath is the resolution at ALL TIMES, no matter how difficult the circumstances and scenario. And I am capable of breath and breathing as long as I am alive, thus no excuses or justifications apply. I commit myself to use being alive as the simple answer to be consistent within my life and as self-change and self-honesty as what is best for all.

Monday, 1 May 2017

Day 673 - Living consistency


With one fear in particular, I have been writing about consistency and how I can be more consistent in working my way past this fear. Thus far I can see that I’ve been up and down with it, where the ups are like the times where I breathe, I might say aloud self-forgiveness here and there (at various moments when the fear arises, but others not – inconsistency). But that is not nearly enough. I must train my body to not go into the fear. So it won’t help me from what I’ve seen and read/heard etc in others’ blogs.

Basically, if I keep going up and down, where I remain stable and then I go into the fear, then, that’s not training my body to REMAIN as the up, as the stability, it’s training my body to go up and down and that is exactly what I’ve seen in relation to this fear. I know it’s going to be difficult and it has been. There are reasons why I’ve been up and down in this cycle as opposed to being up as a stable individual consistently. As I said, I haven’t been consistently saying aloud or within myself, self-forgiveness in moments. Breathing and self-forgiveness in moments is vital. And I see no reason at all why, if I breathe and/or self-forgive in each and EVERY moment during this fear onsetting in any way, shape or form, that I won’t be able to overcome this point and train my body to not go into this fear and train my body to remain stable within this point and generally and within any other points.

It’s literally a win/win situation to be consistent with my breath and self-forgiveness. Not a single loss about it. So this means to be consistent no matter the location, no matter the company, whatever. Because obviously I won’t always be ‘alone’ so to speak or in an environment where I can sound aloud self-forgiveness based on compromise, distraction.

So I’ll be writing more about consistency and living it specifically in relation to this fear and report back on how I go with it. Already today I made great strides with this fear. At work etc, yes as I said, the fear comes up, that will keep happening, but I didn’t go into it and ACT UPON IT basically as allowing the fear to direct me. Though I can work a lot, again as consistency and training myself, to for example, when the fear comes up, it only remains for a second and then I bring myself back, whereas now it might ‘hang around’ for a few minutes. So I’ll work on this, on living consistency, using my breath alwayssssssssss, and using my self-forgiveness/self-realisations/self-commitment statements in moments of course as well as through writing, again, alwaysss lol.